Chili-pili

Aye

2012-01-06T01:18:00.001+05:30

What I seeisn't real,
For my mindsees what I want to see.

Watchingthe mind see what it wants to see,

Is the path to freedom.

Freedomfrom pleasure and pain alike.
Freedomfrom feeling good, from feeling bad.

Whatis good? What is bad?What is it to feel?

Whodefines it? Who is the who to define?

Isit the I-ness of the I?

Andif so, who am I?

Inrealising this, lies the freedom,

Freedomfrom the body,
And the mind,

Shackledby the feeling of the I.

Beyondthe realm of I,

Beyondthe illusions,

Liesthe unthinkable, the undefinable, the timeless,

Thatalone is real! That alone is real!

My problems with Kannada

2011-12-18T19:44:00.000+05:30

"Oh, C'mon Rajesh, I know you are kidding! " I am tired of listening to these words again and again each time someone realises that I don't know to read & write Kannada. What adds to their disbelief, is the fact that I speak a good, sometimes sanskritised, close-to-purist Kannada. As they slowly overcome the disbelief, they inquire - "How come? I thought Kannada is your mother tongue, isn't it so?........"

If you too are amused as you are reading this, please don't be so. I have a proper justification. But, lets not get into "why so?" because its anyway a thing of the past(I hope). I have spent the last few months learning Kannada & I can now read and write(type to be precise) Kannada pretty decently. (Agreed that "decently" is too fuzzy an adjective, but lets put that thought aside for the moment).

It is not just a matter of eagerness but compulsion that has driven me to learn kannada. My job requires me to be able to read & write Kannada decently to survive.But, as I learn more & more of it, the more complex it gets. I have two big problems with kannada as a language-

1. Kannada is too fussy about pronunciations. In hindi, you only have के(ke) कॆ(kai). In kannada you have one more addition - ಕೆ(ke) ಕೇ(kE) ಕೈ(kai). For example, there is only one way to write kendra in hindi which is केन्द्र् . However, kannada allows you to have - ಕೆಂದ್ರ(kendra) as well as ಕೇಂದ್ರ(kEndra). What a mess! In my honest opinion, most of kannada mistakes could be traced to it.

2. Writing Kannada gives you a feel of sculpting. The number of twists, turns & curves are huge! To write a simple word, say "ಕನ್ನಡ"(Kannada), you need to lift the pen nearly eight times off the paper! In English, the same word could be written without lifting the pen even once ! :P
So, how does our national language hindi fare? To write कन्नड the count is a mere four. Besides, the number of curved lines is a lot less!

Since I can do very little about it, I will try to embrace Kannada and patiently hope that it embraces me too!

Dear Karnataka Rakshana Vedike, Jai Karnataka, Mr Vatal Nagaraj & other Kannada ಅಭಿಮಾನಿಗಳೆ(fans), I sincerely hope & pray that you are not reading this post. Just in case you do-

ಸಿರಿಗನ್ನಡಂ ಗೆಲ್ಗೆ!

The problem of relativity

2011-12-08T17:11:00.001+05:30

Most of the problems that we face in life is because of comparison. We want to be something relative to others. I need to get a salary more than the perceived market average. I need to get more than what my peers get. I need to grow taller than others. It isn't enough to just make good profits, it should be more than what my nearest competitor gets. I need to get a girlfriend who is prettier than my friend's.

The media reinforces such thoughts, amplifying the insecurities. You have to be fairer- use fair and lovely. You have to be taller- drink complan.The insecurities are because of the comparison and the world runs on insecurity.

Does it mean that we not compete ? Not at all. Competition is fine. But being jealous is not.

Isn't it enough to be happy? Why the comparative & superlative degrees of happier & happiest ? Why this kolaveri ?

To sir with love

2011-10-08T18:58:00.000+05:30

Another Gandhi Jayanthi, same set of people paying tributes at Raj Ghat, another dry day, the same mundane yearly rituals repeated itself. However, what made mine special were the memories of one of the few persons who has influenced my life so much - my Gandhian Principal.

During my school days, a few other school principals used to derive pleasure from flaunting their status through those big cars of those days. I remember my friend from a "leading" school of the city narrating me how his principal arrives in a Maruthi Esteem to his school, and all about his chamber and the aristocratic dressing.

In contrast, I had a principal who used to cycle his way to school everyday. His dressing was simple yet neat- a well pressed white shirt with a black or a white trouser. He was in fact more approachable than most of the teaching staff. He had a passion for mathematics, and also for removing the prevalent fear for the subject. His idea of mathematics went far beyond the confines of the syllabus. For ex, on a fine day we were given the problem of making the horse pawn cover all the 64 squares on the chess board exactly once.

He constantly engaged with the students to inspire them to read the daily newspapers. On most days, he would spend time with us asking questions on that day's newspaper. This brought in me the habit of reading newspaper everyday. I also overheard a teacher saying that he spent some part of his salary on rewarding students.

One the first day of the public exams, just as I was about to leave, I got a call on the landline(obviously). On the other side was the principal speaking, wishing me good luck.Couldn't believe that the principal sir had called me personally to wish me good luck! Such a reassuring call it was! It boosted my confidence levels manifold.

The last time I met him was when I learnt from the local newspaper that the Gandhian principal had retired. I was in +1 (I PUC) then. I was in two minds of whether to meet him or not. I wanted to, but was very uncomfortable. What would I tell him? It seems so simple now, but back then I was an extreme introvert, not those leaders kind. I eventually went to meet him on the last day of his service. He was busy packing up. I cooked up some story that I had come earlier and that he was not available. Looking back I am not sure why all this was needed. But he understood me like ever before and bailed me out of this embarrassing situation. I din't say anything and stood still. But he could read the emotions on my face. He gestured for a handshake and said, "Rajesh, good luck, do well in life".

As they say -
"The mediocre teacher tells.

The good teacher explains.

The superior teacher demonstrates.

The great teacher inspires."

Dear Veeraraghavan sir, thank you so much.You are more than an inspiration to me!

The flutist in me

2010-03-20T20:59:00.002+05:30

Just yesterday, Srikant, one of my buddies, had come home. He played some amazing flute. Mind blowing!

Actually, we used to learn flute together under the guidance of the same guruji a few years ago. The difference being, he pursued it for a longer time than I did.

Flashback.. 2004

3 idiots join a flute class. Needless to say, I happen to be one of them.

I happened to listen to Pt. Hariprasad Chaurasia's performances. Deeply impressed, I decided to give it a try. After all, it is not so difficult, I thought. A veena has a number of strings, and we are required to tune it, use all the 10 fingers, and most of all looks bulky. A mrudangam uses leather membran and my conscience wouldn't allow me to use one. (FYI - I neither use a leather belt, nor a valet, nothing that contains leather)

After all, a flute having 6-7 holes and seemed very easy to play. Most of all, I loved the bass tone of a bansuri. Also, having seen many hawkers play and sell it on the streets, I thought it to be a rather simple instrument.

I was in search for a guruji, and found one at Kuvempunagar in Mysore. To my surprise, two of my buddies decide to join me. The music institute founders appreciated our interest to learn classical music. They lauded our respect for Indian values, art, culture, etc.. And after a while, our first class commenced.

On the second class (there used to be only two classes a week), we were given our flutes. The music teacher started guiding us. Unlike laymen think, bringing out a flute-like voice(noise?) from a flute is not all that easy, more so if your flute is screwed up. We were taught to get some noise out of it. In total contrast to the melodious soothing flute played by my inspiration, it turned out to be rather irritating.

The disappointment took its first toll on the very first week. One of my friends decided to drop out. My only other flute-mate dropped out after 3 weeks. I remained undettered & committed. However, my practice was interrupted by complaints from my neighbours and my own family members. People complained that they were having headaches after listening to my music. All my close acquaintances expected a jukebox out of me. They thought I could play any tune just like our kannada movie hero who mesmarises his heroine in a typical setting through his music. They did not realize that I was just 2 months into my learning and was just mastering the art of playing the very first pitch - "sa" out of my flute.

Quite expectedly, I too dropped out. My friends and neighbours were relieved. I guess, even my guruji was!

Who knows, in the process, India might have lost another Chaurasia in the making! :)

Many Idiots ?

2010-01-10T20:10:00.001+05:30

This Sunday, I got to meet many people, with diverse interests, most of who had one thing in common. All had left their software jobs after graduating in engineering to persue what they had always dreamt of. One was interested in tourism, another guy wanted to do his masters in Sound engineering, the third was working on biomass gassifiers, and so on.

Watching 3 idiots as well as meeting these folks came as a big relief to me, given that I am aspiring to take up a career which has nothing to do with my graduating degree. After all, bureaucracy & computer science don't have much in common. And there are a number of "Mr.Kapoors" around asking all kinds of questions. One question that most of us have been asked by the local junta is "why did you waste your time studying engineering if at all you had to do what you are doing now?". Well, the answer to this is not hard to find.

Most of us have no idea what we are interested in while making our choices. Even if we have one, it is difficult to resist the pressure from parents, relatives, neighbors, and a host of other acquaintances. It is difficult for someone from a middle class family to decide not to choose engineering(software engineering to be more precise), unless one does not deserve it. Very few people decide to take up careers like journalism, literature, archeology, forestery, commerce etc.

However, one has to agree that, there is nothing as safe and as paying as software engineering in India in the present times. No wonder, engineering is such a sought after career. It is a different thing that we end up doing what at best can be termed third grade patch work.

There is a basic mismatch between the demand and supply in the HR market. There are a number graduates in journalism, and yet, there are a number of unfilled openings. Similar is the case with a number of other professions. Take the case of teachers. None other than the prime minister has rung the warning bells. recently. The country is going to face a major crisis in the field of primary education as there are very few quality teachers. No one is opting to become a primary school teacher by choice. It is definitely one of the most critical professions whose importance is often overlooked. There are hundred other professions where the candidates are "unemployable".

So, what is the way out? One has to choose a job that one dreams of. Even if that means a little compromise on the financial terms. "We may have to settle for a smaller car, a smaller house, but definitely greater joy". After all, when passion becomes your profession, it is heaven!

My Tryst with Godmen!

2009-02-21T00:11:00.000+05:30

Firstly, some disclaimers, I am no enlightened spiritual soul! Nor do I want to belittle the spiritual organisations mentioned in the below article.

It was during my vacations after 2nd PUC during 2002. Like any other CET aspirant, I had the luxury of enjoying about 6 months waiting for the outcome, thanks to the messed-up entrance system.
I used to eagerly wait for SOM(Star of Mysore, a local newspaper) to drop home. Unlike others, I used to start browsing from the last page. My interest was not in the headlines rocking the city, but the events,talks,discourses happening locally.

I used to attend literally every free talk! The first one I cam across was one by Sri Sri Ravishankar's AOL. It was a free introductory talk and I was one of the few kids to attend it. The talk was impressive.I was expecting Guruji to deliver the talk. Weirdly, what attracted me to these talks were not the hope of spiritual enlightenment but the long, mushy beards!

And of course, the free snacks that might be on offer. I must confess that I was utterly disappointed as it was one of Guruji's clean-shaved shishyas delivering the talk. It was claimed that Guruji could recite Bhagavad Gita at the age of five! Alas, I was 4 times that age and could not remember the relatively simpler chemical equations for CET! When it was the question time, I wanted to know the "fees". All the while I assumed that it was a free course. And then I dared to debate with the volunteers on what seemed to be an exhorbitant guru dakshina.

My next stop a few days later was Sidhi Samadhi Yoga. The talk was somewhere in Kuvempunagar. I was happy to see the long bearded master, a Mysore-based scientist, waiting to deliver the discourse. I do not recollect the contents of the talk. But I clearly remember why I quit! At the end of the talk, the master started enlightening us about the effects of food on spirituality. Apparently, brinjal was the culprit of our short life spans. If we could quit consuming brinjals, we could live for some extra 5-10 years. Then came onion. The list grew longer. I thought I had enough of it. I started wondering if I would be finally advised to survive on grass and fodder!

By then, SOM had made a mention of Osho Rajneesh in one of its articles. I believe some public debate was going on & SOM was the forum for discussions. I was curious to check first hand what it was all about. My curiosity took me to Deveraj Urs Road where an Osho library was housed. I must appreciate the librarian's willingness to get drawn into a heated debate on Osho's thoughts with a humble mortal like me. To be candid, what drew me to Osho apart from his beard was the controversy itself.

It was now time to receive some gyan on rebirth. Dr Isacc conducted one interesting meditation session. Oh, I forgot to introduce him. He was a medico by profession and his name has nothing to do with physics. His dad had named the two siblings as Isacc & Newton! Wonder what he would have named his sister, "Curie" ? Be that as it may, he spoke about rebirths, karma etc. Finally, we were to practice the meditation for some time there. Enchanting Japanese music was being played from his laptop, which was not so common those days. It put to me blissful sleep. Finally, this snoring spiritual seeker was "awakened" by his neighbour. I was pretty embarrassed. But, what a deep sleep I had had!

Then came a couple of "Personality Development" sessions. One of them was to be conducted by a local "human trainer". The first thing that came to my mind was a tall, well-built, demon with a whip in his hand trying to train us. But, I decided to be open-minded for I had nothing to lose. The talk was impressive. It was devoid of any spirituality. It was more about memory, public speaking, etc. One of the "human trainees" could remember the names of more than 60 articles! It was soon question time and I wanted to test his skills with 10 chemistry equations. Expectedly, he was unwilling to testify his skill and tried to assure me that I could manage to succeed once trained in the art. But, amidst all this disappointment, the only cheer was the cookies on the desk!

My second "Personality Development" session was at Ramakrishna Ashrama. I must admit that the humble Swamiji defined personality in a refreshingly inspiring dimension. I might be short of space & time to paraphrase the entire discourse. But, I did enjoy it.

I could have gone on & on.. But, I soon joined a local Engineering college and it was the end of my "tryst with bearded Godmen & Goodmen"!

Jai ho!

Talibanism in India

2008-12-29T00:23:00.007+05:30

Recent media reports about self-styled Taliban commanders in Pakistan's SWAT valley threatening schools educating girls has made me do a sober introspection. I fail to understand why they cannot see a smile on other's faces, why they cannot share their joy,why they cannot feel for them. To be honest, I am very disturbed.

Unfortunately, the scenario is India is not very different. There exists Taliban like instincts in rural India, which transcends all religion & caste barriers. This is the other India that I am discovering every day. It hurts to know that most women continue to be treated like cooking commodities, restricting them to their kitchens. Even young girls are not spared. They have a relatively joyful childhood. But once they attain puberty, that seems to be the end of their human life. They are not asked what they want. Young 14 year old girls continue to be forced into, marriage?, no, that doesn't seem to be the right word. I have seen this happening all around Mysore. And Mysore is relatively an advanced society. Cant imagine how bad it might be in say, Rajasthan, how about Bihar ?

I cannot imagine myself being born in one of those families. So much of responsibility at such a young age, at a time when she should be playing in the schools, she has to feed her young ones.
I had read this in text books, but never had I seen it for myself.

Wonder whether this will ever change. As I write this, something in me tells that it WILL.
I continue to be a die-hard optimist. I believe that our generation will not remain meek spectators like the previous one. We have the energy, don't we?

Mumbai & I

2008-11-29T23:29:00.006+05:30

I deliberately used this title to attract some readership, though I have never been there. Most people have been glued to their TV sets watching news channels doing post-mortem of what went wrong at the Taj massacre. I am angry. Very angry. Not at the terrorists or politicians, but at the citizens. I know it is a very bold statement to make. But I stand by it. Let me explain why.

Everyone agrees that what happened in Mumbai was not just a intelligence failure but a collapse of the macro security system itselt. Some call it a failure of leadership, others call it administrative incompetence. But I believe that the problem lies else where. And it is a much bigger problem than it appears to be.

I have been having lots of discussions with a prof of political science who keeps complaining all the while about mis-governance, corruption, dysfunctional democracy etc. My sis has a very similar view. I gave a very patient hearing to all that my prof had to say. But finally, my reply to him was one of my favourite quotes "people get the government they deserve". This powerful one-liner conveys many things. We as citizens do not deserve a better government because we are not good enough. I am not being cynical here. I am only stating the reality, albeit a little bitter.

The anger towards the politicians is understandable, but not justified. We want electricity but are not prepared to have a thermal powerplant at our backyard. The big urban shopping malls lavishly consume huge, huge Kilowatts of power everyday. We do not complain. Neither do we protest. We complain about corruption. But when it comes to getting our Driving Liscence done, we shamelessly offer bribe. I have not met anyone so far who has got his passport verification done without the paying the "mamul". We need not protest or revolt violently. We need to be patient to be honest. There are hundreds such faults in you and me.

My practical question is why should we expect a suo motto change in netajis' behaviour? Are we expecting Gods to appear in their dreams and reform them overnight? They have been corrupt for all these years. "Power corrupts". They will not change on their own. We need to make that happen!

The difficult question is how. It is a very profound question and if I were to know the answer, I would be joining Paul Krugman in receiving the nobel prize! But I am not clueless. The first thing, we need to get over the temptation of blindly voting someone from our caste/religion to power. This will spoil all the social calculations of all parties. I candidly admit that it is a very tough thing to do. But realising what is at stake, I feel it is worth it.

Secondly and most importantly, there has to be a social change in the attitudes of the people at a micro level. I recently attended an inspiring talk by Dr. Balasubramaniam, a very successful social entrapenuer, on "role of youth in nation building". When asked by a youth on how he can contribute, he made the same point - first change yourself before thinking about trying to change the system. "Be the change that you want to see".

Stringent draconian laws controlling the external human behavior are not feasable in a longer run. What we need is morality. "Where law ends, morality begins" Morality regulates the internal human behavior. The main challenge confronting India is not the poverty, terrorism, or the lack of infrastructure. It is lack of values. Everything else is derived from it. And once this root cause is addressed, all other issues will get resolved on their own. For that to happen, we need to take a firm resolve that in every sphere of life, we are going to be honest. That we will not take up shortcuts. That we will have perseverience, and take up responsibility.

I am confident that it is possible. That will be a befitting tribute that we can pay for these brave soldiers who gave up their life protecting you and me.

If you have been, thanks for reading!

Raju ban gaya lecturer !

2008-11-25T23:02:00.004+05:30

Yes, you heard it right! I am now a lecturer at SJCE. Sounds funny? Well, a lot of my buddies feel so. They cannot imagine me teaching. Nor could I before.

Spiderman's uncle(am poor at remembering phirangi names) says "With great power comes great responsibility". An obvious corollary is "Responsibility takes away thy freedom". I cannot sit on the steps of Yampa, the milk parlour where I spent most part of my student life at college. I cannot put on a cool T-shirt. I cannot speak my mind. I cannot wear a bata hawai chapli. I cannot bunk classes. I cannot enter the class late, and if I make that mistake, I will be entering an empty class room . The list of cant's goes on and on. :(

But I have changed. I have a soft corner for all my Gurujis who are my colleagues now. Especially the ones who were liberal in giving mark and during internal assessments as well. During the internals, I can see myself in the last benchers who keep looking at me every now and then, and their wide, tense eyes says it all! I seem to have learnt a bit of the art of telepathy, and I can read them telling me "sir, please don't look at us, show mercy, do not disturb us in this knowledge transfer!". A while later, the last few minutes, and they seem to be cursing me for my persistence.

This is not all. Every student wishes me every time I meet him/her. This frequency and the benevolence on their faces increases after every internals, because they hope against hopes that this will influence my evaluation of their blue books and offset the damage that I have already caused before.

The theme of discussions with colleagues always revolves around one single topic, politics. No, they are not bothered about predicting the Kashmir polls or the problems with coalition politics. It is all about campus politics. About who does what, who is close to who etc. And I give a patient hearing, nodding my head at all times in all directions to make them happy.

An interesting phase of my second profession. Enjoying every bit of it. Except for the thin pay slip at the month end!!

Think, think and think...

2008-11-22T20:02:00.008+05:30

I had a wonderful experience the last week which I would love to share. I teach at a local alternate school called "Kaliyuva Mane". The school is based on the principle of freedom. Children have freedom to think and ask questions. It is a free school and most of the kids are dropouts.

But that seems to be a blessing in disguise.

The most crucial asset that any human has is his intellect. Unfortunately, most of the schools in Indian educational system believe that education is merely transfer on knowledge from book to mind.

Sometimes it is not even transfer of "knowledge", but transfer of a few sentences. This is in my view the biggest tragedy of India. This seems to be the root cause of all issues facing India. We have stopped questioning. We have stopped thinking.

Coming back to my experience at "Kaliyuva Mane", I teach Geography to a bunch of kids who will take up SSLC exams in a year. No, they are not in 9th class! Surprised ? Well, that is the uniqueness about this school. Children are divided into groups based on their current knowledge and there are no classes as such. Children learn, learn and learn. And take up SSLC exams in one go! So, I was teaching them the "rivers of India". I was telling them that there are two river systems, North Indian & South Indian, and the usual stuff. And that the Northern river system is perennial, Southern is not, etc. When I mentioned about South Indian rivers getting dried up, pat came a question, Mahesha asked "Anna(Brother), why not connect the two of them?" !! I was dumb stuck. Before I could recover, Narayana interrupted with "Dumbo! don't you know? South India is at a height." !!

This is precisely what all great learned thinkers, scientists & policy-makers at the highest level are debating about ! They call in "Interlinking of rivers". These kids were having a similar discussion here. This incident removed all doubts that I had on the relevance of Alternate Education that Ananth sir of Divyadeepa preaches. We need children to think & this is what will make India a knowledge society. Not the 3G iphones or gphones that "dudes" and "babes" might show-off. This creativity needs to be encouraged & nourished. And only then can we hope to have a prosperous, peaceful & happy society!

Remembering Manju

2008-11-22T19:55:00.001+05:30

19th of November should be a very proud moment for Mysoreans. On this very day three years ago, a courageous Manjunath Shanmugam gave up his life for a noble cause. As we all know, Manju, working as a sales manager for IOCL at Lakhimpur, took the menace of corruption in retail petroleum distribution system head-on, and had to pay the price.Very rarely do we find such a courage, bravery, and valor in the modern youth.

We Mysoreans should be proud of his association with our city. He did his under graduation from SJCE and went on to join IIML. I hear that he opted to join the PSU, IOCL by choice. He believed that he could make a "change". I am proud that I am from the same college that he was. What surprised me the most was that he also happens to be from CS branch. I was discussing about him with one of my colleagues at SJCE who also happens to be his classmate. I was told that he was like any other "dude" during his college days. He used to waste his time like most of us used to do. He used to prepare "chits" for internals! Typical of any JCite. Looks like something @ IIML changed his way of looking at things.

His contribution is more relevant in the current context that ever.Transparency International, in its latest nation wide survey, places Karnataka at the top vis-a-vis corruption. What is more worrying is the fact that people seem to accept it as a part of life. Corruption seems to have spread its wings from womb to tomb. It is high time we wake up and make our voice be heard.I only wish we had more shanmugams. Manju, we are proud of you and will not let your sacrifice go in vain!